@deerington Application

[awfulcer]

CONTENT WARNING: This application will contain references to alcoholism, suicide, rape, police brutality, racism and homophobia.

IN CHARACTER

Character Name: Jason Dixon
Canon: Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri
Canon Point: End of film

In-Game Tattoo Placement: Middle back. It’ll take him a few months to realize it’s there.
Current Health/Status: Dixon recently suffered nasty third-degree burns on his face, neck and hands. Though most of the healing is done, he’s still on a round of antibiotics, pain medication and ointments, and likely to need some sort of pain management for the rest of his life due to nerve damage.
Age: 35, but he looks 45 due to casting two decades of smoking and heavy drinking.
Species: Human

History: The wiki summary of the plot is fairly decent.
Hometown/World: Dixon comes from a small town in Missouri called Ebbing, which is based on Sylva, North Carolina, a rural Southern town with a population of about 2,500, a good distance from any larger city.

Personality:

To claim Dixon’s smart would be bald-faced lie. Just about no part of Dixon’s cognition fires on all cylinders. He struggles with memory retention, focus, emotional intelligence, pattern recognition, prioritization, impulse control, forethought, and, most cripplingly of all, curiosity about the world around him. A lot of this has been internalized; Dixon’s come to accept that he’s a dumbass and has allowed that to curdle into both a bitterness towards others and a chronic need for validation from people he respects.

The latter drives him to be fiercely loyal and protective of those people, often in a blustering, ill-thought manner. One of the few qualities he has that can be read as a virtue is his devotion. Throughout the film most of his negative behavior is in direct response to what he feels are attacks on his commanding officer; he also respects his chief enough to try and internalize seismic shifts in worldview, with limited success. Someone who can make him feel valued will find him a steadfast, unquestioning and probably unwanted attack dog on their behalf.

Most of Dixon’s terrible personality is dictated by the fact that he has very little ability to healthily regulate his own emotions, which means he’s prone to flights of intense violent rage, weeping, depression and physical distress symptoms. Though he does have a gentle and caring side, it is constantly overrun by his inability to keep his chill and his tendency towards brutish anger. This inability to respond appropriately gets numbed somewhat with alcohol, but he’s still alarmingly quick to raise his voice or try and punch someone out in the middle of the street. He spends most of his life reacting on impulse with very little thought to consequence. The inability to think ahead also manifests as a distracted laziness; he doesn’t work hard and wouldn’t know what to do if someone didn’t spoonfeed him directions.

To continue enumerating Dixon’s virtues, he’s also petty. While the more explosive elements of his nature are more controlled by temporary whims, he’s capable of holding a grudge and acting on it in small, unnecessary ways to annoy or bully others.

His emotional lability doesn’t just encourage anger and cruelty, however. Dixon’s more than capable of turning that inwards and engaging in some good old-fashioned self-loathing and self-destruction. He falls easily into self-pity and suicidal hopelessness, and towards the back half of the film even starts to spiral into actually feeling straight-up remorse. He has absolutely no healthy way of coping with any of these or other emotions, so he drinks heavily (both habitually and in binges) and picks fights. He doesn’t place much value in his own safety or life, which means he doesn’t back down or hold up. This recklessness could end up an occasional positive in that he won’t be selfish when it comes to danger, but for the most part it’s just pigheaded recklessness.

All of this reflects a very childish mindset, and there is a sort of boyishness to the way Dixon presents himself. He reads comic books and grooves along to pop music; he plays hopscotch when he thinks no one’s watching, according to a deleted scene; he has an incredibly close relationship with his mother and he has no romantic interests. He’s also capable of a surprising amount of tenderness and kindness, although the aforementioned emotional and psychological issues frequently disrupt that side of his nature. He’s the result of some very stunted emotional growth, which has led him to become an unstable, dangerous and vulnerable adult.

Perhaps most importantly, it means he's malleable and capable of growth. Dixon’s moral code is in flux. At the beginning of the film, he has a very self-serving, craven view of morality, with a black-and-white sense of good guys and bad guys and a belief that people who break the law get what’s coming to them (unless it’s him or one of his buddies). Towards the end of the film, he’s made an effort at following Willoughby’s directive to be a better person and hasn’t seen it pay off, and is falling back onto old intellectual habits of seeing the world, a might-makes-right, retributive perspective. He has not, however, completely settled back into that architecture of violence, and is questioning whether it’s the right way to proceed.

Depending on the events of the game, he could go either way, either succumbing to that desire for brutal temporary satisfaction and self-righteousness, or a more whole and kind understanding of how to act. He’s trying to be better, but his will is weak and ethics are more complicated than he has much of a grasp on, so he’s suggestible to tempting impulses.

Additionally, Dixon’s got terrible, close-minded ideologies, due in part to his lack of interest in learning anything more and in part plain due to environment, both in a rural Southern town and in the police force. He’s racist and homophobic, for which I will be vigilant about providing an opt-out post. His mama, whom he adores, doesn’t believe the South should have been desegregated, so there’s that.

Finally, Dixon is a serious alcoholic. It’s not a particularly well-hidden secret. He shows up to work hungover, he’s rarely without beer or hard liquor in hand, and when he binges, he’ll get to the point of sloppy pants-wetting drunk and then drive home. He’s aware it’s a problem, but he entirely lacks the fortitude to try and do anything about it.

Abilities/Powers/Weaknesses & Warping: His only real ability is that he has a nice singing voice and a wealth of 80’s pop and classic country music knowledge. As for weaknesses, he’s a chronic alcoholic and habitual smoker who doesn’t exercise, which means he’s pretty out of shape. He’s used to relying on his gun and his badge to bully people, which means he has no real combat skills, although he is strong enough to throw about a hundred and forty pounds out a window.

He’s also dumb as hell and could probably be outwitted by a seven year-old or a particularly well-trained cockatiel.

Inventory: iPod and earbuds; small pet tortoise; loaded shotgun; cell phone with a bunch of dumb pictures of animals; wallet with useless credit cards and two family photos; 1979 Ford Ranchero car-based pickup
Writing Samples:

Log 1
Log 2

OUT OF CHARACTER

Player Name: Lisa
Player Age: 28
Player Contact: hotpinkcoffee or hotpinkcoffee#2676 on Discord

Other Characters In Game: None
In-Game Tag If Accepted: Jason Dixon: Lisa
Permissions for Character: permissions post
Are you comfortable with prominent elements of fourth-walling?: Yes

What themes of horror/psychological thrillers do you enjoy the most?: I love shared-nightmare horror or truly dream-logic horror, including the sense that you can’t escape because you’re stuck on a loop trying to complete a task. Horror where a character is compelled to act against their will is great.
Is there anything in particular you absolutely need specific content warnings for?: The use of death penalty material gets under my skin, as I’ve worked in the field before, so please no images of electric chairs or hangings if possible.
Additional Information: I make judicious use of my opt-out post.